Why the Rush?

I like to think that I make decisions with my heart. Sure, I also analyze choices and try to be smart about it. Use my head. I even have a tendency to over-analyze... but that's until I bring myself back and remind myself to just trust.

And I do trust. My intuition. That little voice that seems to come directly from the soul. It whispers do it. Now. Why not? Why wait?

So, I try to start achieving my dreams now. Not later... Not when I think I will have more time. Or more money. Not when I think I shall be retiring. Not when this or that is supposed to happen. Of course, I prioritize and don't start them all at once. But I start now. Something. Anything. I want to be closer in some way. And my bucket list always loves the attention.

Last week, I imagined someone asking me What's the rush?. Why do I seem in a hurry to make my dreams come true? Isn't dreaming itself part of the adventure?

In my hypothetical dialog, an answer came to mind. Directly from my subconscious. Or my soul. Or perhaps it was my heart speaking. Either way, the answer that floated to my mind was, simply... Because I am dying. I surprised myself. I had never seen it like that before. At least, not so clearly. I am not announcing an illness. I have not been hiding anything. But it's true, I am dying.

Suddenly, it became clear that I do not need to be given a precise timeline to realize the urgency in living. I do not need to know how much time I have left to see that the end is nearer. Every day. For everyone.

We're all in this together. Assuming that time is somewhat linear, every minute, we get closer to the end. Each one of us carefully, or carelessly, navigating towards our own happy ending.

So, I live like this because I'm dying. I don't know if I have a day, a year or a hundred. And if I knew, would I do anything differently? Well, no. And that's the important part.

I want to keep asking myself this. If I was given a year to live, what would I change? So far, nothing. But the day my answer is different is the day I will have to reconsider my life choices.

What would you change?